


Waiting

by sariloire



Series: Ashae Lavellan [24]
Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Prompt Fic, solas realising his feelings gives me life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2015-11-02
Packaged: 2018-05-04 14:24:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5337380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sariloire/pseuds/sariloire
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Solas becomes antsy waiting for the Inquisitor to return from battle, and tries to understand why.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting

Solas hated it when he was left behind while the Inquisitor and others went out to fight.

He knew the reasoning, Ashae had apologetically explained it to him the previous week. She needed heavy hitters and stealth, magic wasn’t a necessity. She tried to pull a smile from him by saying that she wasn’t necessary herself, as she was useless without her magic. Solas had nodded his understanding, but spent the rest of the day in grumpy silence after the party had left for their mission.

That had been eight days ago. His mood had shifted from grumpy to downright unpleasant, or so Dorian had told him three times that day. He wasn’t denying it; keeping to himself was the best way to stop his clipped words from hurting others. But Dorian wouldn’t leave him be, and Solas was getting more frustrated with every visit the man made down the stairs.

“Solas, I believe you could do with some lunch.” Dorian said as he made his way down the stairs, leisurely strolling across the room to stand before his desk. Solas didn’t look up, pulling a book across the desk and opening it.

“I’m busy, Dorian, and have no need of food at the moment.”

“I don’t believe you’ve eaten today.”

“I am not a child, I can attend to my meals when I am hungry.”

Dorian let out a frustrated noise. “Solas, you may not be a child, but you are definitely acting like one. The Inquisitor leaves you behind, so you get jealous and pout.”

Solas looked up at the man, his eyes narrowing. “Jealousy, Dorian? That’s how low an opinion you have of me? I am simply frustrated that I could be of no use. Nothing more.” He looked back down, shaking his head and turning the pages with as much force as he could without tearing them.

“Is that so? Then you have always felt this way? I seem to recall that you enjoyed staying behind at Haven, and when we first arrived at Skyhold. You said it was quieter and you could explore the Fade or read in peace.”

Solas stopped his angry flipping through the book, his mouth suddenly becoming dry as he thought back to those times. Dorian had a point. He had always enjoyed his solitude, he used to enjoy the free time to read or study, or even paint. When had it become such a burden to him to not go out on the field? When did he start getting so angry over being left behind?

His eyes unfocused, he searched back through the things that had happened since the last time he was left to his own devices at Skyhold. What had happened to make him feel the way he felt, his stomach clenched, his ears listening for the sound of the returning party, his feet moving of their own accord to the battlements so that he could scan the horizon to see the Inquisition flags as they returned, his eyes seeking out a familiar glint of blonde hair, his…

His train of thought stopped as suddenly as if a wall had been erected out of thin air.

_‘No, no, that can’t be it.’_

Solas thought back to the day Ashae had come to tell him she was leaving him behind. Thinking back, he didn’t mind that she didn’t need his skills. He didn’t care that she the party had no use for another mage, and that the warriors were needed.

He wanted to be with  _her_. He wanted to journey at her side, where they could walk and talk together for hours on end, and spend the nights exploring the Fade together on those occasions that they happened to find each other.

It was her. It wasn’t the adventure, it wasn’t the mission.

It was her.

“I believe I see your brain finally beginning to work.” Solas nearly jumped at the voice, his eyes snapping to Dorian, who was smiling smugly down at him. “I’ll leave you be, now that you have a handle on the situation.”

Solas blankly watched him walk back up the stairs, continuing to stare in the distance as his mind picked up speed again, racing through everything that had happened since the Inquisition had been founded. Everything centered around Ashae.

True, the kiss they shared in the Fade had elicited a response from him that he had previously never imagined he would feel for anyone again. He could picture every smile she had given him, the way her eyes lit up when they discussed history, the ancient elves, and the Fade. The way their hands brushed as they walked, though he had never let himself clasp her fingers with his own.

After the kiss, he had tried so hard. So very, very hard to shut down the feelings he knew were growing.

And here he was, weeks later, pining away his time because she had left him behind.

Solas groaned, dropping his head into his hands. Sliding his palms across his scalp, he looked down at his desk to a piece of paper he had been sketching on while reading a text on ancient elves. It was a sketch of Ashae, with her smiling lips and shining eyes. One he only half remembered drawing.

He pushed back from his desk, standing up and walking from the rotunda. He hoped some air would clear his head, help him push away the realization that he was travelling down a slippery slope, one he must recover from before he lost himself completely.

Stepping out onto the battlements, he breathed deeply, closing his eyes as a soft breeze swept over him. The silence lasted only a moment before a horn sounded and the gates below opened. Looking down, he saw the familiar flags and an even more familiar head of blonde hair.

As she walked through the gates, something caught her attention and she looked up. Solas’ eyes met with Ashae’s, and she smiled widely, raising a hand in greeting. Solas felt his heart skip a beat at the smile, before he returned it with one of his own, raising his hand in return.

He turned and made his way back across the battlements to the main hall, his pace faster than usual, as he knew he would find her waiting.

And he would ignore the screaming warnings in his head, just for one more day. Falling in love was not something he would let happen at this time.

At least, that’s what he told himself. Even if deep down he knew it was far too late to try to stop it.


End file.
